Confessions of a Hockey Wife
Hi there! I am honored to be featured as a guest blogger on a blog with all these incredible women. I haven't blogged since college (so I may be a little rusty!). Thank you for letting me share my story with all of you. I love to inspire and be inspired!
Our love story began at a football game one chilly fall night. I was 12 years old. We attended the same school but prior to this moment had never spoken to each other. He offered me his coat, and that night we ended up talking the entire game. The night ended abruptly but with a kiss goodbye. We didn't spend time together until the following year. Freshman year picture day came, and he and I walked home from school together. The sparks were still there, and they never went away after that. Fate must exist.
Flash forward to present day. Max is still the love of my life. We are High School sweethearts and will be celebrating our two-year wedding anniversary this July. We are proud dog parents to three pugs, and plan on expanding our little family this summer. Southern Wisconsin is where we call home and recently purchased a house...what an adventure that has been!
Max works for a professional hockey team, scouting High School and college-aged players in the US and Canada. He played hockey growing up, but followed his passion for writing as an adult. I also travel for work with a sales job for a shoe company. With both of us being gone, it can get extremely difficult. Long days on the road are nothing glamorous. We both get homesick for each other and the dogs.
As he drove away the other morning, I couldn't help but hurt a little inside. The same feeling I get every time he leaves me. I'm not a military wife, but some days I feel like one. There are times when he is only home four days out of the entire month! When Max travels up into Canada, cell phone service is hit or miss. I am so blessed to have family living nearby, as it gets rough being by myself.
The hockey wife role can be exhausting. Our relationship requires a great deal of patience, understanding, commitment, and sacrifice. I love my husband more than anything, and that is the ultimate force that keeps us together. All of our life experiences have gotten us here today. Good and bad, I know we are meant to be. We continue to grow and build our life together, one day at a time. It’s a pretty amazing thing.
But let’s not fool ourselves. Even fairytales aren’t perfect. I love my husband, but even he has some quirks. After long trips he comes home and throws his stuff down. Laundry piles cover the floor. Meanwhile… the dog poop doesn’t get cleaned up, the carpet doesn’t get vacuumed, and the toilets don’t get scrubbed. And he is glued to his phone. This is nice if I need to reach him, but when he is home it becomes a nuisance. I feel like he’s never 100% “there” with me when he is checking scores, Tweeting, emailing, etc. The phone rings constantly, with calls from general managers, scouts, players, coaches. Sometimes I feel as though I am competing for his attention. I don’t feel like I get out what I put in sometimes. Does anyone else feel like their relationship can be lop-sided? Don’t get me wrong, he’s a great man with good intentions. He is tired when he gets home and wants to “relax”, and that leaves me constantly over-analyzing situations.
Our most recent debate involves kids. I stopped taking the pill a couple weeks ago. This was my choice. Due to the timing of the hockey schedule, my husband has made it very clear that he doesn't want to start trying to have children until July. I respect his decision, but it is tough to wait! Until then, I will continue to obsessively organize, rearrange, and decorate our new place. We're not getting any younger...so what is he waiting for? Am I being selfish?
Our lives are constantly dictated by work. For once I would just like to roll with tide and let life happen!
Until next time,